5 Cheeky NSFW Gifts For People Who Can Take A Joke

5 Cheeky NSFW Gifts For People Who Can Take A Joke

Happy Fcking Whatever Prosecco

Make your bottle stand out amongst the dozens your mates will inevitably get this year, with a little bit of personalisation magic. Let’s face it, they don’t quite deserve champagne - but a boring old bottle of fizzy plonk from the shops screams NO EFFORT.

This stunning bottle, on the other hand, is the best of both worlds AND under £20. Nice. You can personalise it with whatever you want, as long as it begins with HAPPY F***ING _ __. The possibilities are endless! Go mad, we won’t stop you.

Rude Puzzle Book

If you know someone who's more Where's Willy than Where's Wally, they'll have a fab time leafing through this book of naughty brain-teasers. Strictly for grown-ups, this is the perfect set of puzzles for clever perverts, innuendo masters and anyone in possession of a smutty vocabulary.

Here's a taster: what sex position is hidden in the anagram: HER WAR ELBOW? How about O PROG LINT? If you can figure them out, you're a better, saucier riddler than we are.

Edible Anus

Celebrations. Heroes. Quality Street. Roses. Ferrero Rocher. Milk Tray. Some sort of Hotel Chocolat or Lindt variant, if you’re posh. Some sort of Thorntons box, if it’s the noughties again. Liqueurs if any old people are involved. After Eights, of course. Never before in the history of the English language has any one paragraph contained equal measures of yum and yawn.

Thank goodness you bought these Edible Anuses to liven up Christmas this year, before your whole family falls into a We-Have-The-Same-Damn-Chocolates-Every-Time coma.

Modelled on a REAL woman’s anus, these tongue-in-cheek Belgian chocolates are a real showstopper. They’ll hesitate to get stuck in, but they’ll be back for more before you know it. So good that even your mum can overlook the whole arsehole thing.

Kama Sutra Scratch Poster

Think summer is the highpoint of the shagging calendar? Think again, mon ami: the week between Christmas and New Year is a veritable boom of sexual activity, according to some studies.

Biopsychosocial theories aside, you wouldn’t want all that festive f***ing to get boring, now, would you? Ensure that someone you know has a cracker of a Christmas season with this scratchable Kama Sutra poster. Copulate your way through 100 mad positions and scratch ‘em off when you’re done to mark your achievement for all to see. Will you achieve enlightenment, or just pull a muscle in your back? You’ll have to get shagging and get back to us.

Perhaps best to limit this one to partners or close mates who can take a joke. They might take it a bit better than your boss or that sexy barista you’ve got your eye on.

Make It Dirty

Feeling frisky? Good. You'd have to be to have a hope in hell of winning this naughty game.

Putting a dodgy spin on your usually tepid movie trivia games, Make It Dirty is the game of familiar films made filthy - and it's almost trivia-less! Gather your favourite dirty-minded filthslingers for an 18+ round of turning famous movie titles dirty. For example - Beauty & The Beast is now Booty & The Breast. Or even the more accurate Beauty & The Bestiality. When the timer is out, it's time to read out your answers and let the director pick their favourite. Pretend you're pitching to a real director and you may well end up with an extra point - no need to go all casting couch on it though.

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Not satisfied? Not cheeky enough for you? Fortunately, cheeky isn’t something we’ve got in short supply. Check THIS out for more NSFW gifts.

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