The Secret Santa Gift Guide 2019

  • 3 min read

Secret Santa is REALLY Hard.

Weird headline, but it’s true! Unless you’ve got this guide to help you through it all. All gifts under £12.99. We gotchu.

If you can’t be bothered with any of this… Secret Santa Mystery Box!

Lovingly (and hilariously) CrapWrapped to perfection, the Secret Santa Mystery Box is the perfect solution for all of your Secret Santa gifting woes. Duh, it’s in the name. Take the strain out of enforced festive fun by giving them a guilt-free gift of a genuine surprise. What's inside? We can't tell you. You'll have to wait for them to open it!

If they have a beard… Christmas Tree Beard Kit!

You’re basically gifting them an excuse to be the centre of attention for an hour or two with this kit. They’ll instantly clip the baubles into their beard and comb in a slick of green shimmery paint and everyone will be asking them questions. “Ooh, is that your Secret Santa gift?” “Who got you that?” “Whoever got you that must be really clever and sexy, I wish I had them for Secret Santa.”

If you want to play it super safe… Hot Chocolate Bombes!

Nobody doesn’t love hot chocolate. Even if you’re unlucky enough to draw someone who isn’t a fan of the sweet brown manna from Heaven that is a cup of steaming cocoa studded with marshmallows, they won’t mind because they can re-gift this and score major points with the chocolate lovers in their life. Boom.

If you’re feeling brave… Edible Anuses!

Prepared to weather the storm of being called in for an HR meeting on your first morning back in the office? Give ‘em these. It’s the perfect tongue-in-cheek gift for brown-nosers, snitches, and anyone with a fantastic sense of humour. At the end of the day, it’s a box of delicious chocolates so they can’t complain TOO much.

If they like booze… Unicorn Tears Gin Miniature!

Christmas gifts are a great way to introduce people to things they would never ordinarily try on their own. For example, glittery gin! Even if that sort of thing is right up their street, few people are opulent enough to splash out on themselves. You’ll be doing them a big fat glittery favour.

If you want them to laugh when they open it… Grow A Dick!

Another one for someone with a good sense of humour. This grow-your-own chilli pepper kit has a naughty twist: the chillies are willies! Yeah, it’s a bit naughty, but it’s a nice, fun present for anyone with a windowsill who cooks. In other words, literally everyone.

If you want them to feel the warm fuzzies when they open it… I’ll Be There For You!

Everyone loves a bit of FRIENDS and everyone will love diving into this book of quotes, quizzes and trivia all about their favourite six fictional buddies and their adventures in New York City and beyond. The perfect way to tell them you’ll be there for them.

If you’re seriously, SERIOUSLY stumped… Wacky Waving Inflatable Tube Man!

When you don’t know how to make them happy on a diddy budget, your only option is to give them a big surprise and cross your fingers. If nothing else, you’ll have given them a memory. They’ll never forget the moment they unboxed this little fella. He’s sort of the essence of Secret Santa in a way.


Still stumped? Don't worry. We’ve got loads more Secret Santa options here.

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