Instant Regret Chilli Chocolate

A friend from work gave me half of a small block of this nasty chocolate while I was trying to run a busy X-ray department. I was very pleased to have been offered some chocolate as I had been busy and not managed to entertain lunch.
My brain was not ready for the mayhem that followed..........I began by grossly perspiring from my armpits and other areas of my body that I didn’t know even had sweat glands. After a few short seconds, the oral heat and pain hit me. Until that day I was convinced that I had a mouth like asbestos, but clearly every material has a melting point! Mine had well and truly been reached.
The friend that handed me the chocolate started to panic and ran for the resus trolley, just as I began to feel faint. The phone was ringing but I was in such a panic that I ripped the receiver from its stand and shouted some random words of gibberish to the Accident & Emergency consultant on the other end of the line.
After about 10 minutes of gas and air, I started to come round and managed to finish my shift.
The next morning I needed a barium enema to line my bowel walls before I passed a huge molten log into the porcelain dish!
Thankfully the barium enema toilets at work have a special set up that allows you to flush even the most disgusting of sphincter trembles without the outside world hearing you steam press in your Calvins!
I booked myself in for a colonoscopy as I was convinced that I had managed to perforate my rectum in the urgency of clearing my intestines.
After 24 hours, normal life was resumed.
In future I will read the other reviews and take heed of the milk!
Thank you Mr Instant Regret.

A friend made me taste it, knowing I can eat (and love) hot food.
She never understood how I could eat 2 blocks, just like that; when, she swallows, a really little piece, to feel drops coming out of here face, with fire in her mouth ;)

Really interesting chocolate :)
For once, you understand; when it's said : Hot.

Its not often I think the name of an item is rather understated.
Sat in my hotel room, unpacked my over night bag and lo and behold, this bar of chilli chocolate laying all lonely and wanton in the bottom of the bag, an item I had forgotten about.
Well it would be rude not to have some.
I have include a picture to give you an idea of its claims. The name of the bar should have given me the biggest clue.
I consider myself somewhat of an expert in the world of chilli chocolate. to qualify this, I have eaten a lot of different chocolate, eaten a lot of different chillies, eaten a few bars of chilli chocolate of differing strengths, rarely read instructions or warnings and after this incident realise a part time f**king idiot.
In short, I opened the inner wrapping, smelt the chocolate, not a hint of chilli aroma. So I break off just one square. Pop the piece into my mouth, let it melt and coat the insides of my mouth (as you do) and swallow the residue. (Pah, its weak and exaggerated) Almost in the same moment as swallowing, I put piece number 2 into my mouth. It was that very instance, a volcano of epic proportion erupted at the back of my throat and tongue. In a reflex action, I swallowed the second piece. My eyes were not only watering, not in a subtle way but streaming, I could hardly breath, my chest was convulsing and a strange noise was emanating from me.
My brain however was in fine form, 'drink milk' it was telling me. All I could find in this moment of panic was 2 of those single cartons for your cuppa the hotels provide. The tab snapped as soon as I tried to open it (remember, vision was blurred by the tears) then my finger went through the lid causing the contents to spray the room (a UV light at this point would have confused the situation)
About a minute later, I realised I was sat on the edge of the bed, hugging myself, rocking back and forth and audibly whimpering. The pain in my throat eased up after approx 20 minutes, the feeling in my tongue and lips a good while later.
I admit, I have met my match in this confectionery. If you like a challenge or want revenge on someone that steals the choc bars from the works fridge, this is for you.

I bought this for my family so we could have a challenge. I'm the only hot sauce type person in the house so I thought it would be a laugh for everyone else. We all had 3 blocks each, and to to be honest, none of us thought it was as hot as it was going to be. I didn't even need a drink and nobody went for the milk. It is very hot, ill grant them, but I've had hotter sauces and I think 9 million scovilles is an exaggeration.

Absolutely fantastic.. I’ve bought this many of times for challenges and pranks. A co-worker who was taking food from our fridge got a nice surprise

Ridiculously hot, just ate 1 1/2 pieces. Luckily I was at home and had a tooth brush at hand to get it off my tounge. Would recommend to give to someone you don't like too much. I got it for a 50th birthday present from someone that supposedly likes me. Could make her a nice Mocha.

A friend of mine brought me half a piece. I thought my thongue was gonna fall off. I would describe it in 3 steps.
1 : delicious milk chocolate
2 : first spicy sensation around where you bit. Surprising, hot, but not unbearable.
3: and then you swallow again, spreading saliva. And the burning feeling gets intense for like 15 minutes.

10/10 would recommend.

The only non- issue with the "instant regret" chocolate is the lack of an official government health warning ....Crikey its hot!! Could do with someone confirming that it's chocolate, my taste buds have been destroyed.. Great fun!!!!

Deffo not as bad as i thought it was gonna be, was ment to b 6million scovilles, think thats a lie

Our 2nd time purchase of this item; taste buds just about recovered from the last one a couple of years ago. There were lots of Bad Words said. It’s amazing

We have a lot of fun with the Chocolate at work