You know when someone has a really smiley face and all you want to do is squish and smush it? Well your sickly-sweet fantasies are about to come true with the latest breakthrough in soft and sugary photo-fectionary – Flump Face.

Just upload a high quality photo of you, your mate, your dog or anyone you like and we'll immortalise them on a chunky A4 or A5 slab of marshmallow. With its moreish vanilla flavour you'll be quite literally stuffing your face in no time. It's like a sweeter, slightly more wrinkly version of yourself that you can twist, rip, lick, slap, stretch or just gnaw on like a ravenous dog grabbing a chew toy.

There's a highly satisfying "voodoo doll" element to them too; now you can feast on your ex's beautiful eyes, dunk them in hot chocolate or toast them on the BBQ – make sure they meet a sticky end.

It puts other personalised photo gifts to shame, so forget about lousy printed canvases and the likes of schmoonpig.com – this is the single greatest thing to ever flop out of a printer.

• We will not crop/edit your pictures in any way
• Any square images will have a white border put around them so they fit on the rectangular mallow
• Heart-shaped cookie cutters not included

• Your (or your mate's) face printed on a giant personalised marshmallow
• Match your appetite, choose between an A4 or A5 slab
• Moreish vanilla flavour
• A sweeter and slightly more wrinkly version of yourself
• The exciting alternative to boring supermarket birthday cakes
• Lasts for 4-6 weeks once opened, 6 months if sealed (no need devour it instantly)
• It's confectionery's answer to Snapchat, one minute your photo is there, the next it's gone, forever, in your belly
• Full ingredients: Glucose-fructose syrup, sugar, water, dextrose, starch of maize, gelatine, vanilla flavouring

• A4 – measures approximately 30cm(W) x 21.4cm(H) x 1.5cm(D)
• A5 – measures approximately 21cm(W) x 15cm(H) x 1.5cm(D)