- Import duties on a real living breathing spitting llama are through the roof these days, plus you have to wait for it to get through quarantine and all that nonsense
- Being a wild animal, real llamas tend to smell a bit - whereas this one smells nice and clean
- This cuddly cosy heatable lap warmer will NEVER spit on or at you - not even in your general direction
- Putting him in the microwave won’t cause a meaty explosion
You could tuck into a book with a glass of wine, surround yourself with candles and incense while listening to a podcast, binge-watch your favourite Netflix show while scoffing a bowl of M&Ms, or share an intimate bottle of Prosecco with your partner.
Made from sustainable bamboo, this smart bath caddy extends to fit all tubs and features a whole host of useful features to level up your bath times:
- A clever slot securely holds your wine glass so you can't knock it over
- The mid-section flips open to prop up books or tablets
- A recessed area looks after your soap and sponge - or a candle or two
- A pair of fold out legs transforms this bath shelf into a lap table for when you're not in the bath
Just imagine those faces, merrily tiled across your neatly wrapped gifts, and the joy on your recipient’s faces as they notice and think to themselves, “Wow, [YOUR NAME HERE] sure is a generous, creative, hilarious specimen. I might give them all my money/propose to them/buy them a new car/write an album of songs about how lovely they are/wash all of their dishes forever.”
When your feet get tired and your tootsies are cold, slide them into this super-soft plush foot massager. With two vibration settings, the furry foot compartments will warm your feet while the gentle vibration action will relieve tension in your leg and foot muscles. The cover is removable for easy washing and the compartments will fit all foot sizes. There isn’t an easier way to melt the tension away.
We don't sell golden thrones or rent out teams of loyal manservants - but we know that every aspiring princess deserves their own set of fancy regal robes.
Now you can relax like royalty with our Personalised Luxury Princess Dressing Gown.
Possibly the softest, warmest, snuggliest garment in the entire known universe. Featuring a large hood (to leave room for your crown), as well as two deep pockets for all of your essentials - mobile phone, gold sceptre, share-size bag of Maltesers etc.
And that's not all, we can print the back of this luxurious dressing gown with any name you desire; your own, your kid's, your partner's - just hit the 'Personalise' button and we'll take care of the rest.
Whether you're having a sleepover with friends, settling down for a Disney marathon on the sofa, or going to get the morning papers - make sure you do it in style with our Personalised Luxury Princess Dressing Gown.
This ingenious floating gizmo projects several seriously psychedelic multicoloured light sequences onto the bottom and sides of the bath. It's truly hypnotic, especially as the pulsating effects are distorted by the water in the tub. Put on some suitably upbeat music, dim the main light and strike that classic legs apart, arm in the air pose and you could be in Studio 54, albeit nude and soaked in hot water. Not such a bad thing in our book.
Battery-operated and water resistant, the Underwater Disco Lightshow features a button that changes the patterns (some subdued, some dynamic), so you can alter the mood in an instant. What's more its curvaceous shape causes the lights to reach out to every corner of the bath. If you're feeling really decadent you could even plop this plastic doodah in your pool, pond or hot tub. Water based shenanigans will never be the same again.
The Underwater Disco Lightshow has been a real hit here at Firebox HQ. In fact we're standing here wrapped in towels having just emerged from our communal bath/disco. Invigorating? We spent the whole multicoloured soak thinking up water-based disco classics to shoehorn into this description. Sadly we could only come up with Car Splosh, Heaven Must Be Missing A Plughole and a few tunes by Splashford and Simpson. Suggestions welcome.
Whether you're chilling out or getting ready for a night on the tiles (no, not the bathroom tiles), this incredible device is guaranteed to add a mesmerising kaleidoscope of light to bathtime. So don't just sit in the tub twiddling your pruning thumbs; order an Underwater Disco Lightshow and Blame it on the Bathtub!
Some would say that these Personalised Face Socks are a bit much, and that’s exactly why you need them in your life. Whether you want to buy a pair for yourself or as a gift for your favourite person, this delightful wardrobe accessory adds a bit of personality to the dull world of foot fashion.
Simply upload a photo of your choice (making sure it follows our printing guidelines) then our wizards will turn your image into a multi-portrait masterpiece that will make you the envy of the world.
Painful feet from a long day of being up and about all day? No need to break down and rye, wheat love to introduce you to our cosiest invention yet.
It’s Bread Shoes! (Whole-y grain, we bread your mind, just what you were after!)
Slip those knackered extremities into these soft baguettes. Or are they loaves? Either way, we can’t get enough of these buttery-soft slippers. Expertly cushioned, the podiatric bakers behind these certainly knew what they were doing.
Let’s face it, you knead these. It’s the yeast you could do for those hard-working feet of yours. P.S. We were on a roll with the puns but we’ll stop now. Crust us.
- Warm ambient glow - check!
- Soothing transitions between colours - check!
- Made from real Himalayan salt crystals - check!
- Packed full of mystical properties and health benefits* - check!
- USB-powered so you can enjoy all of the above wherever you are - checkedy check check check!
All you need now is a fistful of incense and a Tibetan singing bowl!
Simply upload your pictures and we'll pop them on a delightfully squishy Mushion and send them on their way to you. Make sure the photos you choose are clear and not blurry or super pixellated - your Mushions will only be as good as the photos you submit.
What will you get on yours? Happy face and sad face? You and your partner? Your friend and their dog? Mum and dad? Your two best mates? Phillip Schofield and Holly Willoughby? The possibilities are endless!
Not ready to get a tattoo on your face? How about getting one of your face instead? Much better. Just upload any face and we will turn it into a set of tattoos for you and your mates’ to enjoy. Turning up to an event with the host’s face tattooed on your arm will make a great start to any party.
Pressures of modern life giving you a headache? Struggling to get a good night's sleep? Sounds like you need a hug. More specifically - a HedHug.
Based on the science of Deep Touch Pressure Therapy, our HedHug Weighted Eye Mask applies a gentle, comforting pressure across your eyes and face to help you relax and drift off into a deep and restful sleep. You can think of it like a big ol' comfort blanket, for your face.
"But don't all eye masks make you really sweaty?" Nope! HedHug is made from super smooth, breathable cotton that naturally absorbs heat away from your body to keep your face cool and dry. It’s as durable as it is soft on your skin!
This malleable mask is filled with an even distribution of premium weighted micro-beads and is designed to sit flat against your face. Combined with the adjustable velcro head strap, this prevents any light from entering around the edges so you can enjoy a total blackout - whatever the time of day.
Eyelids starting to feel heavy yet? You betcha. Just slip on the reassuring weight of the HedHug and take a load off your mind.
Snuggle up with Pierre and rest your head on his lovely soft shaft - or keep him on your desk to make your colleagues INSTANTLY contact HR to voice their concerns. Treat yourself to this adorable addition to your plush collection - because you’re girth it.
Please note: this is not an accurate to scale version of a human penis. Thank god.
Filled with 20 stirring scratch n' sniff scent pads, this chunky cardboard book explores the rich history and evolution of this wondrous drug. Covering all topics from the science behind the munchies (it's very real), the botanical link between beer and weed, and why smoking cannabis makes Pink Floyd sound so damned good.
Entertaining, informative (did you know you could nibble or sniff peppercorns to reduce the paranoia? Incredible.) and beautifully-illustrated — it's the perfect gift for total pot heads or those with just a little cannabis curiosity.
Turn your holiday into a LOLiday with our personalised beach towel. Superimpose your face on a hilarious choice of different bodies, from rad bod to dad bod, baby to lady, and more.
Always dreamt of having a 6-pack or fantasised about carrying a well-honed beer belly? Make that dream a reality with our Beach Bod Personalised Beach Towel!
Choose from different hilarious bodies, upload the face of your choice and we’ll do the rest.
This attention grabbing beach essential makes the perfect gift for family and friends who like to laugh at their own expense. But you can also gift it to yourself, because you absolutely deserve it.
As an added bonus, it’s theft-proof too, because who’s going to steal something with your face on it? This extra security measure means that you’ll be free to make awkward Tik Tok dance videos on the water’s edge without fear of losing your favourite new towel. #perfect
The new version of its iconic predecessor is a raspberry flavoured pink gin bursting with a rare breed of botanicals: juniper berries, mandarin, almond, raspberry, coriander and pepper, plus exotic horned melon, Buddha's hand and star fruit.
Refined emotion harvesting techniques deliver a purer, shimmering unicorn tear infusion.
Unique in every pour. Swirl to infuse and serve with classic tonic and fresh berries, sip over ice or get creative in cocktails.
The original shimmer spirit™
Whether it’s for home cooking or big garden parties, this Personalised Face Cooking Apron will lighten the mood when you inevitably overcook the steaks. You can add any face you like from your own to your giftee’s celeb crush, just upload the pic and we’ll take care of the rest!
Why drink out of something that doesn’t have your face on it when you could be drinking out of something that does have your face on it? Or, even better, your mate’s face on it! Or your dog’s face? We’re not fussy.
No matter who you’ve got in mind, we’ll slap their face on a mug for you - an extra fancy heat change mug that makes their glorious image appear when you add hot water. Can any of your other mugs make your dad appear out of thin air? Didn’t think so.
Simply upload your picture and our magic tool will show you what the finished product will look like. Then, sit back, have a cuppa in one of your inferior mugs, and wait for your stunning new facey one to arrive.
There’s no doubts about it, this bit of kit is gonna be your new best friend. The iDream Smart Eye Massager is designed to apply calming pressure and soothing heat to help alleviate the strain caused by excessive screen time and not enough sleep. And, unlike an actual (selfish) masseuse, it doesn’t need breaks or food. By encouraging blood circulation and blood vessel dilation, iDream can even help reduce dark circles, puffiness and dry eyes. It’s also got bluetooth so you can have your own tunes delivered straight to your ears to help you relax.
Are your colleagues still coming up to your desk and asking you to do things for them, even though you told them you’re completely swamped with work? Are they flooding your inbox with reminders?
Instead of telling them to p*** off and risk getting hauled into your manager’s office, try this mini ticket dispenser, a system tried and tested by butchers across the land. It comes with 100 paper tickets, and even a little electronic notice board to display the current number being “served”.
What’s more, it includes a booklet outlining different ways to tackle common office distractions, like Karen from accounts asking you if you watched last night’s episode of The Masked Singer.
Guaranteed to elicit a chorus of 'oohs' and 'aahs' from gobsmacked guests; this attention-grabbing lamp uses the power of electromagnet induction technology to defy gravity and float majestically in mid-air. Featuring a super detailed and colourful 3D surface, it even rotates like a real planet!
With a gentle tap of the touch-sensitive base, the brightness and colour temperature can be easily adjusted to suit your environment, from a soft warm glow to a bright white light.
Looking for a new statement centrepiece? Elevate your home decor with Levitos.
Bloody street lamps and inner-city smog! Unless you live in the middle of nowhere, you rarely get to enjoy the night sky in its full twinkly star-filled glory.
But now you can free yourself from cosmic deprivation and light up your living space with the Twilight Laser Projector!
This sleek little device brings all the awe-inspiring magic of the night sky into you home by projecting epic space visuals onto your ceiling and walls. Just sit back and use the remote control to flick through various mesmerising light modes, constellations and colourful clouds of space dust.
It's even got a built-in Bluetooth speaker so you can play your favourite tunes while marvelling at the projections. Bit of Gustav Holst, anyone?
PS: Now also with Google Home and Alexa.
Calling all pub quiz factfiles, prepare for the ultimate battle of brains and nerves with The Shocking Truth. Players must answer the questions correctly to win the game and avoid getting a cattle prod to the finger. Not for the faint (or pacemaker) hearted, The Shocking Truth will definitely amp up your next games night to the next level.
Now you can recreate that youthful exuberance and unhinged joy from the comfort of... your toilet!
The waterproof and slip-proof Toilet Piano Mat rolls out flat to reveal a set of large, foot-friendly piano keys for you to stomp upon. Perfect for having a casual tinkle, honing your musical abilities, passing the time, or just drowning out a chorus of earth-shattering flatulence.
The creators have even thrown in a song book and handy 'Do Not Disturb' sign - you know, for when you're composing your next movement.
Have you ever thought of writing a TV series involving you and your friends? You might never get the chance to pitch it to a streaming service, but now you can bring your idea to life with a personalised Netflix-style poster.
Whether you want your poster to feature you and your significant other as the stars of a romantic drama, or you and your best mate in a hilarious buddy comedy, all elements of the poster are customisable, from the text to the photo.
For best results, we recommend using a high-resolution photo (one taken with a good phone will do just fine).
We’ll even frame it for you, if you like.
Whether you're savouring the sunset on your patio, hosting a rooftop soirée, or simply dreaming of a sun-kissed Italian vacation, your personalised Aperol Spritz logo glass will induce some serious cocktail envy.
Simply personalise the glass with a name of your choice and prepare for a Spritz-filled summer.