
Are you bored at work? Would you rather be having a kickabout in the park with your mates? If you can’t skive off work, this penal-tea mug with a built-in football net is the next best thing.
And don’t worry - you won’t have to make a ball out of scrunched-up paper, because the mug comes with its own miniature football. All you have to do is decide what style of penalty you want to try - cheeky panenka or the run, skip and shoot favoured by Jorginho and Bruno Fernandes?
The best part is that when your manager walks by your desk and asks if you’re working on your goals, you can confidently say yes!

You’d be surprised how much work goes into looking disheveled, that’s why a beard comb is a must for every hairy-faced hero. Take your gift to another level when you add a message of your choice to this personalised beard comb. Beautifully engraved on quality cherry wood, they will think of you every time they brush the leftover lunch out of their whiskers.

Make the gifting experience begin before they’ve even opened the present with this Personalised Milestone Birthday Wrapping Paper. Simply upload a photo of the face you want to feature, choose the birthday age and we’ll do the rest, printing your design all over a sheet of high-quality wrapping paper in the colour of your choice.

Why drink out of something that doesn’t have your face on it when you could be drinking out of something that does have your face on it? Or, even better, your mate’s face on it! Or your dog’s face? We’re not fussy.
No matter who you’ve got in mind, we’ll slap their face on a mug for you - an extra fancy heat change mug that makes their glorious image appear when you add hot water. Can any of your other mugs make your dad appear out of thin air? Didn’t think so.
Simply upload your picture and our magic tool will show you what the finished product will look like. Then, sit back, have a cuppa in one of your inferior mugs, and wait for your stunning new facey one to arrive.

If someone you know loves plants but can't seem to keep them alive for more than a week, then this quirky Mini Plant Life Support will inject a bit of life into their smaller houseplants. Don't worry, there are no needles involved, just put the tube peg into the soil and the plant will water itself!

He’s no use when he’s all floppy, so fill him up with hot water before getting tucked up. Pro-tip: Tuck him down your pants to experience the thrill of having your very own obscenely large, hot dick.
He’s not just for show, it turns out the humble penis is the perfect shape for a hot water bottle, distributing that lovely warmth sideways through the balls and lengthwise through the shaft. Mmm, cosy.
Just try to ignore his weird little face and be thankful that real penises don’t have them. Mind you, if you were with a man who had a schlong that big, its little grin would be the least of your problems...

Wine glasses have always held a deceptively large amount of wine, but this impressive receptacle can stow away an entire bottle - a whole 750ml of the finest boozy grape juice you can get your hands on!
It's the perfect gift for those sensible types who insist on sticking to 'just' one glass of wine.

We're piously proud to present Inflatable Jesus, a 100% accurate replica messiah in all his beardy, robed greatness. Sure he's only 50cm tall but people were a lot shorter back in those days.
He can

The Mini SubWOOFer Speaker is not just a superb play on words - this pooch is packing some serious power! At only 3" long this cheeky chappie slips right into your pocket so you can enjoy your favourite tunes at home, work or on-the-go.
Our favourite feature? No need to struggle trying to get a leash on him, you can wirelessly connect to this loyal companion via Bluetooth!
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