Novelty Gifts
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£11.99
4.7 /5
Lil' Nitro - The World's HOTTEST Gummy Bear Right now you might be wondering why you only get one single gummy bear in the box. Just one?! But once you've tasted Lil' Nitro there'll be no doubt in your mind – only fear, regret and panic caused by the crazy pain you're experiencing!
Put simply, Lil' Nitro is the hottest gummy bear in the whole world This innocent-looking sweet treat has been infused with a 9 million Scoville chilli extract, making it 900 times hotter than a Jalapeño pepper.
Based on 3 reviews (3) Put simply, Lil' Nitro is the hottest gummy bear in the whole world This innocent-looking sweet treat has been infused with a 9 million Scoville chilli extract, making it 900 times hotter than a Jalapeño pepper.
£12.99
5 /5
Upside Down Wine Glass - Single No, you haven't had one too many – you're actually seeing an Upside Down Wine Glass
This boozy optical illusion is guaranteed to make your dinner guests do a double-take while they rack their brains as to why there isn't wine pouring all over the table! The usual 'top' of the glass is sealed and the 'bottom' is open, while the main glass and stem remain hollow to accommodate all of that tasty vino.
Based on 1 reviews (1) This boozy optical illusion is guaranteed to make your dinner guests do a double-take while they rack their brains as to why there isn't wine pouring all over the table! The usual 'top' of the glass is sealed and the 'bottom' is open, while the main glass and stem remain hollow to accommodate all of that tasty vino.
£9.99
4 /5
World's Smallest Confession Booth Just take a moment to think about all those wicked little things you've done. Tiny, seemingly inconsequential acts. Eventually, they start to add up...
No one knows the precise criteria for entering the gates of heaven (or hell), but we reckon a lifetime of tiny sins is basically the same as doing a murder – IT'S TIME TO REPENT!
Now you can share all of your darkest secrets with the World's Smallest Confession Booth. Just pop open the curtains, 'kneel' your fingers on the mini prayer cushion, spill the beans, and a concealed priest will mutter “You are forgiven.”
Job done. Now you can get back to lying to your partner and stealing stationery from the office.
Based on 1 reviews (1) No one knows the precise criteria for entering the gates of heaven (or hell), but we reckon a lifetime of tiny sins is basically the same as doing a murder – IT'S TIME TO REPENT!
Now you can share all of your darkest secrets with the World's Smallest Confession Booth. Just pop open the curtains, 'kneel' your fingers on the mini prayer cushion, spill the beans, and a concealed priest will mutter “You are forgiven.”
Job done. Now you can get back to lying to your partner and stealing stationery from the office.
£7.99
5 /5
The Muff Mug The bush, the beaver, the lady garden, the landing strip, the MUFF!
Celebrate the evolution of female pubic hair - in all of its beautiful forms - with the Muff Mug!
Featuring illustrations of 'classic' styles from au natural to waxes, vajazzles and beyond.
Based on 1 reviews (1) Celebrate the evolution of female pubic hair - in all of its beautiful forms - with the Muff Mug!
Featuring illustrations of 'classic' styles from au natural to waxes, vajazzles and beyond.
£6.99
4 /5
Toilet Bowl Light Drinking too much water, staring at phone screens late at night, those nightmares where you can't run/walk, snoring, stupid songs circling your mind, internal monologues and foxes rutting in the back garden. Something is going to wake you up.
Once you're awake, you now have a choice. Should you use this break in sleep cycles to use the toilet?
Yes you should. But the world is a dark place. Especially your bathroom. So what are your options? You can't turn the light on, that's mental. You'll be instantly and violently awake.
You could leave the lights off and try using instinct and porcelain echo feedback to find the centre of the toilet but it's way too messy. You need a 3rd way.
You need the Toilet Bowl Light.
It's light-sensitive so it will only turn on in the dark, and motion-activated so it will only light up when you walk into the bathroom at night.
It comes equipped with six colour options - single colour or cycling effect - and fits any toilet.
Now you don't need to shuffle nervously through the dark trying to avoid smashing your leg/shin against the toilet or apologise sheepishly to better halves when they inspect the erratic results of your night-time manoeuvres.
Let the Toilet Bowl Light take the toil out of the toilet.
Based on 2 reviews (2) Once you're awake, you now have a choice. Should you use this break in sleep cycles to use the toilet?
Yes you should. But the world is a dark place. Especially your bathroom. So what are your options? You can't turn the light on, that's mental. You'll be instantly and violently awake.
You could leave the lights off and try using instinct and porcelain echo feedback to find the centre of the toilet but it's way too messy. You need a 3rd way.
You need the Toilet Bowl Light.
It's light-sensitive so it will only turn on in the dark, and motion-activated so it will only light up when you walk into the bathroom at night.
It comes equipped with six colour options - single colour or cycling effect - and fits any toilet.
Now you don't need to shuffle nervously through the dark trying to avoid smashing your leg/shin against the toilet or apologise sheepishly to better halves when they inspect the erratic results of your night-time manoeuvres.
Let the Toilet Bowl Light take the toil out of the toilet.
£9.99
3 /5
No Hands - Non-Contact Hygiene Keyring
Based on 1 reviews (1) Dirty door handles, bacteria-ridden buttons, crusty cash machines, mucky mobile screens – Germs. Are. Bloody. Everywhere.
It's inevitable we'll come into contact with them at some point. And then we'll touch our phone, or our face, or someone else's face. And the next thing you know the whole neighbourhood is coming down with a nasty cold.
Well not any more! Thanks to No Hands – the Non-Contact Hygiene Keyring made from antimicrobial copper.
And not just some cheap copper coating that'll scratch off in a matter of weeks, but pure solid copper that naturally kills microbes, bacteria and viruses within a few hours on contact. Gooo science!
Never mind keyring bottle openers, how about door openers? This neat little device is a germaphobe's dream – with an ergonomic hook to operate doors and handles, and a rubberised precision tip for pressing buttons and using your smartphone.
Always forgetting to go out with a bottle of hand sanitiser? No problem. This little guy slips comfortably onto your keyring so you can keep it with you at all times!
from £19.99
5 /5
Project Yourself Cardboard Projectors It looks like the ol' cinema is going to be off the agenda for quite a while, so it's now up to you to bring the big screen home instead!
Get some popcorn crackling away on the hob, dim the lights, and slip your smartphone into the back of the Project Yourself Cardboard Projector. This stylish and portable package features a high-quality glass lens with an impressive 8x magnification to transform your miniature mobile movies into glorious cinematic events.
Don't get us wrong, we love going to the cinema but here are six reasons why this is a pretty solid upgrade:
Based on 1 reviews (1) Get some popcorn crackling away on the hob, dim the lights, and slip your smartphone into the back of the Project Yourself Cardboard Projector. This stylish and portable package features a high-quality glass lens with an impressive 8x magnification to transform your miniature mobile movies into glorious cinematic events.
Don't get us wrong, we love going to the cinema but here are six reasons why this is a pretty solid upgrade:
- A bunch of kids aren't going to talk over the whole thing
- Enjoy sensibly priced popcorn and drinks
- You can eat an obnoxiously smelly hotdog without feeling self-conscious
- Just pause the film if you need to nip to the toilet
- You can even stop it completely if it turns out to be a dreadful choice
- Seriously comfy seats and generous leg-room for all ...we'll leave it up to you whether you want to play half an hour of trailers and car adverts.
£6.99
2 /5
How To Swear In Sign Language In the immortal words of Ronan Keating – "You say it best, when you say nothing at all"
We've all flipped the bird or a cheeky V, and most of the time that's all the situation requires – a mad moment of road rage, a useless co-worker leaving the room etc.
But if you yearn to expand your gesticular vocabulary, you need to get your hands on How To Swear In Sign Language.
This handy set of cue cards introduces 100 vulgar hand gestures; each one comes with simple illustrated instructions so you'll be signing Shit for Brains, Eat a Dick, Fuck Face and Cock-topus in no time.
Based on 2 reviews (2) We've all flipped the bird or a cheeky V, and most of the time that's all the situation requires – a mad moment of road rage, a useless co-worker leaving the room etc.
But if you yearn to expand your gesticular vocabulary, you need to get your hands on How To Swear In Sign Language.
This handy set of cue cards introduces 100 vulgar hand gestures; each one comes with simple illustrated instructions so you'll be signing Shit for Brains, Eat a Dick, Fuck Face and Cock-topus in no time.
£12.99
5 /5
Plant Life Support We've lost count of the number of plants we've accidentally sacrificed over the years. Not enough water, too much water – we'd like to claim it's the plants being picky but we know we're wholly responsible for their pathetic demise.
Introducing Plant Life Support, the miniature lifelike IV drip for your houseplants! Pop it into a pot with the included stand, fill it up with water and it'll take care of the rest – slowly feeding your plant with just the right amount of water as and when it needs it.
It's the perfect gift for neglectful plant parents or for when you need to take a short trip away – especially when your neighbours are even worse than you are at looking after houseplants!
Based on 1 reviews (1) Introducing Plant Life Support, the miniature lifelike IV drip for your houseplants! Pop it into a pot with the included stand, fill it up with water and it'll take care of the rest – slowly feeding your plant with just the right amount of water as and when it needs it.
It's the perfect gift for neglectful plant parents or for when you need to take a short trip away – especially when your neighbours are even worse than you are at looking after houseplants!
£12.99
5 /5
Naked Ramblers Mini Planters What could be more liberating than a naked stroll in the woods with your nudist pals? Nothing but a nap-sack full of sandwiches on your back, fresh air circulating around your nether regions, just being at one with nature...
Naked Ramblers are way ahead of the curve, one day we'll all be doing it.
For now, you can dress up your houseplants with this cheeky set of free-loving explorers – a butt-naked reminder to get closer to nature. Oh and to make sure you do some occasional pruning.
Based on 1 reviews (1) Naked Ramblers are way ahead of the curve, one day we'll all be doing it.
For now, you can dress up your houseplants with this cheeky set of free-loving explorers – a butt-naked reminder to get closer to nature. Oh and to make sure you do some occasional pruning.
£8.99
5 /5
The Cat Butt Colouring and Activity Book Cats are meticulously cleanly animals, but they don't half love showing off their arses.
The Cat Butt Colouring and Activity Book pays homage to these delicate derrieres, with 45 line drawings of pert cat booties winking you in the face. Enjoy colouring in lasers shooting from an intergalactic cat butt, a chill skater cat that isn't ashamed to hold his tail a little too high, and more!
With an additional 25 games to play, this adult activity book is a veritable feline frenzy that every cat lover can get behind.
Based on 1 reviews (1) The Cat Butt Colouring and Activity Book pays homage to these delicate derrieres, with 45 line drawings of pert cat booties winking you in the face. Enjoy colouring in lasers shooting from an intergalactic cat butt, a chill skater cat that isn't ashamed to hold his tail a little too high, and more!
With an additional 25 games to play, this adult activity book is a veritable feline frenzy that every cat lover can get behind.
£5.99
5 /5
Stressticles These are Stressticles. Stress Testicles. A lovely rubberised sack of balls to grab and manipulate to ease your anxious mind.
And they're therapeutic for both men and women!
For women:
When the moment strikes, just give these balls a pulverising squeeze and know that if this was real life, the owner of the testicles would be paralysed with fear and pain, dry-heaving and wishing for a swift death. What a calming thought.
For men:
Stop playing trouser billiards like a mucky little ape! It might feel wonderfully relaxing but it's horrific to watch. Keep your hands off your – in all probability – unwashed balls and relieve yourself with this rubber prosthesis instead.*
*although don't stop checking them for lumps n' that. Maybe do it in the shower.
Based on 1 reviews (1) And they're therapeutic for both men and women!
For women:
When the moment strikes, just give these balls a pulverising squeeze and know that if this was real life, the owner of the testicles would be paralysed with fear and pain, dry-heaving and wishing for a swift death. What a calming thought.
For men:
Stop playing trouser billiards like a mucky little ape! It might feel wonderfully relaxing but it's horrific to watch. Keep your hands off your – in all probability – unwashed balls and relieve yourself with this rubber prosthesis instead.*
*although don't stop checking them for lumps n' that. Maybe do it in the shower.
£5.99
4 /5
Marshmallow Willies We know what you're thinking – as penises go they're certainly on the small side and they're soft. But sprinkle a little sugar into the mix and these Marshmallow Willies will provide you with a pleasure beyond compare.
Cock-based confectionary at its absolute finest, these miniature members are willy delicious and the perfect mouthful for snacking on or sharing with your mates.
Based on 1 reviews (1) Cock-based confectionary at its absolute finest, these miniature members are willy delicious and the perfect mouthful for snacking on or sharing with your mates.
£9.99
4 /5
Cat - Astrophe Some games make you wade through a veritable War-And-Peace-length tome of rules before you can even begin setting up the board. Not this one.
Cat-Astrophe has one aim: you stack the cats.
That’s it.
There’s no timer, you can take as long as you need.
They who stacks the cats the highest wins. It’s that simple. Anyone can play this. Kids and adults. Strangers and best mates. Big groups or on your own. Dumb people and clever people. People who hate games and people who love games. People who don’t speak the same language and people who do. Cat lovers get to play with tiny little adorable vinyl cats, cat haters get to see the tower inevitably topple. What’s not to love?
Based on 2 reviews (2) Cat-Astrophe has one aim: you stack the cats.
That’s it.
There’s no timer, you can take as long as you need.
They who stacks the cats the highest wins. It’s that simple. Anyone can play this. Kids and adults. Strangers and best mates. Big groups or on your own. Dumb people and clever people. People who hate games and people who love games. People who don’t speak the same language and people who do. Cat lovers get to play with tiny little adorable vinyl cats, cat haters get to see the tower inevitably topple. What’s not to love?
£12.99
3.5 /5
World's Smallest Turntable Too scared to play all your lovely vintage vinyl in case you tarnish its resale value? What a modern problem. Luckily we’ve got a modern solution. This Teeny Tiny Turntable!
Complete with three different mini-LPs, this turntable is truly teeny, tiny, and bags of fun. Just slot one of the ‘records’ onto the pin and give it a spin to hear 70s funk, classic rock, or a bit of good ol’ fashioned jazz.
But the fun doesn’t stop there - you can even customise it using the included stickers or swot up on your music history with the included 32 page book of fun facts about the best records of all time.
It’s even better than a real record player! Certainly cheaper, anyway.
Based on 2 reviews (2) Complete with three different mini-LPs, this turntable is truly teeny, tiny, and bags of fun. Just slot one of the ‘records’ onto the pin and give it a spin to hear 70s funk, classic rock, or a bit of good ol’ fashioned jazz.
But the fun doesn’t stop there - you can even customise it using the included stickers or swot up on your music history with the included 32 page book of fun facts about the best records of all time.
It’s even better than a real record player! Certainly cheaper, anyway.
£14.99
4.7 /5
F*ckboy Tears Gin Liqueur When he doesn’t believe in labels, starts speaking to you after months of silence, sends you ‘you up?’ or ‘Wyd? xx’ at 2 AM, begs for nudes and says all his exes are crazy… He’s a f*ckboy.
You don’t deserve that. So we made them cry, then we bottled their aching sadness.
All that sweet retribution turned their salty tears into a juicy passion fruit and mango flavoured shimmering gin liqueur with a 20% ABV. It’s the perfect partner for prosecco or tonic water and a slice of grapefruit. Swirl their tears around your glass to unlock their magnificent holographic shimmer, reassured at least a few f*ckboy's were harmed in the making of this mythical elixir.
Warning: drinking too much of this may lead to rogue ex-texting. Be on your guard.
Based on 3 reviews (3) You don’t deserve that. So we made them cry, then we bottled their aching sadness.
All that sweet retribution turned their salty tears into a juicy passion fruit and mango flavoured shimmering gin liqueur with a 20% ABV. It’s the perfect partner for prosecco or tonic water and a slice of grapefruit. Swirl their tears around your glass to unlock their magnificent holographic shimmer, reassured at least a few f*ckboy's were harmed in the making of this mythical elixir.
Warning: drinking too much of this may lead to rogue ex-texting. Be on your guard.
£9.99
5 /5
Grow A Dick
Based on 1 reviews (1) Spicy bellend! No, it’s not an STD, it’s the organic produce from our super easy Grow A Dick Kit! This sassy little cube has a big surprise inside: spoiler alert, it’s everything you need to grow a girthy batch of capsicum annuum - AKA phallic chillies!
This is no bird-of-paradise-flower-situation, these spicy red numbers are unmistakably penile from head to shaft. Except for the little green bit on the stem, obvs. If you actually have one of those on your knob, please see a doctor, you may be at risk of being diagnosed as a plant.
All you have do to bring your willy chillies to life is open the cube and pour a little water on the pre-planted seeds. Pop it in a bright, warm place and keep watering every so often to keep them moist - in 12-18 days, you’ll be seeing a red cock rising out of the soil. Mental. In a few weeks, you could be slicing your very own scarlet bellend into a sexy stir fry! Nice.
When you’re ready to repot your plants into something more fitting (coming soon: the Firebox terracotta vagina), the magical eco-friendly cube will slowly decompose and turn into valuable coconut fibre fertiliser for the plant, enriched with all sorts of stuff that makes chillies fully erect big and handsome.
Now all you need is a pair of ginger balls to go with them for a culinary genital match made in Heaven.
£7.99
3 /5
Unicorn Poo Bath Bombs Not only do we harvest their tears to create high quality spirits, now we offer up their technicolour excrement for your bathing pleasure.
Just plop a few Unicorn Poo Bath Bombs in your tub and they'll fizz and roam around the water, leaving a psychedelic marble of bright colours in their wake.
What's more, because these Unicorns have been fed a rich (and brutally strict) diet of raspberries, their dreamy droppings will fill your bathroom with a fragrant fruity aroma.
Based on 1 reviews (1) Just plop a few Unicorn Poo Bath Bombs in your tub and they'll fizz and roam around the water, leaving a psychedelic marble of bright colours in their wake.
What's more, because these Unicorns have been fed a rich (and brutally strict) diet of raspberries, their dreamy droppings will fill your bathroom with a fragrant fruity aroma.
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